"Why Me" A poem

Why Me?

What’s happening to me? Is this a dream or reality?
First I was at home, now I wake up alone.
Voices all around, no familiar faces to be found.
I want to say more, please take hold my hand and walk me out through that door.

A sense of urgency rushing all around.
I’m there for a moment, then cannot be found.
How long have I been in this bed, what’s happening in my head?
Where can I be? What’s happening to me?

They won’t let me sleep. I can’t get on my feet.
I’m in so much pain, will I ever laugh again?
There’s needles again, oh no not more pain.
How long will this go on. Just let me be gone!

Machines are bleeping, tubes in my mouth,
White walls now dark places, I’ve got to hang on.
The retching the pain, another headache again
I try desperately to sleep. Oh! No! I can’t eat.

This time’s not right for me, there has to be more fight in me.
My family is so dear to me, how I need them so near to me.
Bright lights are a fear to me, like knives cutting into me.
Stay close be here with me, the nights are so long to me.

Confusion, hysteria are about to set in.
Don’t leave me know I’ll make a terrible din.
Bare with me be kind.
I’m not really going out of my mind.

There’s been problems in my head, the nice man just said.
I’m moved to another bed, what’s that he just said?
My hairs all gone, I’ve still got my nighie on.
I feel ever so weak, not more tablets I need sleep!

Now smiling faces, cards and gifts all around.
Well wishes are said, they want me home now instead.
A new day is dawning, life’s given me a warning.
There’s still fuzziness in my head, I wish I could remember what was said.

I’m leaving my hospital bed, I’m heading home.
I must do as I’m told and can’t be left alone.
I’m so glad to still be here, life is precious and dear.
I have fear held within but this battle I’ll win.

Maureen Mellor – July 2003

This was written by Maureen Mellor who had a Brain Haemorrhage its a poem she often reads to to people in the support group